Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Review

HOW TO STEAL A MILLION



















Released: 1966
Director: William Wyler 
Starring: Audrey Hepburn & Peter O'Toole

Grade: A
  
How to Steal a Million belongs in the rare category of films that manage to combine comedy, suspense, and romance into one seamless package (the other one that springs to mind is 1963's Charade.) A somewhat neurotic Audrey Hepburn and an oh-so-charming Peter O’Toole join forces to steal a fake work of art, all while drenched in mod style. It’s one part heist movie and one part romance, the kind of movie I could easily see men and women enjoying equally (which is a rare thing among rom coms.)

“I don’t sell them to poor people, I only sell them to millionaires and they get great paintings like this one.” That’s the central argument of Charles Bonnet, master art forger and father to Audrey’s Nicole. Art forgery runs in the Bonnet-blood, Nicole’s grandfather carved his own Cellini’s Venus (modeled after Nicole’s grandmother). Charles’ forgeries have gone undetected for ages and he’s grown cocky. So cocky in fact, he lends his prized Venus for display at a Paris museum. The only problem is the museum makes it a policy to run tests on all of its art. One quick examination would be enough to reveal the forgery and put Charles in prison for life. To save her father the fate of prison (and herself the fate of exile in America), Nicole decides to steal the unstealable Venus. To do so she enlists Simon Dermott (O’Toole), an art thief she accidentally shot in the arm one night in her house.

Peter O’Toole, with his bright blue eyes and equally dazzling smile, is perfectly cast as the assumed-art-thief. He’s charming and flirtatious with just a little bit of goofiness thrown in. O’Toole’s malleable face perfectly registers how flabbergasted he is at just about everything Nicole does. “I’m a society burglar, I don’t expect people to rush around shooting me.”

Hepburn is also great, playing a wealth woman always on the verge of a nervous breakdown due to her father’s felonious hobby. Nicole asks Simon to meet her for drinks to enlist his help on the Venus heist. Her normally chipper persona is replaced with a femme-fatal one. Dressed head-to-toe in black lace, Nicole attempts to put on the cool exterior of a woman accustomed to a life of crime. Only Simon’s facial reactions (and his occasional faux-noir-speak) let us in on the joke- that he thinks Nicole is being just as ridiculous as the audience does. It’s a brilliant scene that establishes how far Nicole will go to save her father, and how out of touch with the crime world she is, all while trusting the audience to get the joke without having to spell it out. It’s the kind of scene that makes you sigh and say, “they just don’t make films like this anymore.”

Most of the film focuses on the heist itself. Simon doesn’t fill Nicole in on his full plan so she serves as an audience stand-in, discovering the details only as they’re set in motion. And boy, is it a great plan. Using only a magnet, boomerang, costume change and a few tools, Simon manages to pull off the crime of the century. The best thing about the plan is the way Simon relies on human psychology as the lynchpin of it all. The machine guarding the Venus may be infallible, but the humans controlling that machine are perfectly capable of making mistakes. One false alarm is annoying. Two false alarms are enough to make anyone turn off the alarm system. After that, it’s as easy as plucking a flower from someone else’s garden

This was one of my favorite movies as a kid and one I would always sit down and watch when it came on TCM (I know, I was a weird kid). Heist films hold up surprisingly well on multiple viewings. I suppose it’s because the thrill doesn’t come from whether or not they will pull off the heist (they almost always do), it comes from seeing the details fall perfectly into place. It’s one of the reasons I can watch Ocean’s Eleven every time it comes on TV. The criminals make it look so easy, but in a way you can only spot after the fact (“Oh, why didn’t I think of that?”) I’m impressed every single time I watch the magnet-key-rope scene in How to Steal a Million. Sure you need a very specific kind of door to make it work, but it’s still a brilliant idea that makes you wonder what kind of seedy-past the screenwriters had.

It’s also fun to think about how much easier it must have been for criminals before the advent of constant camera surveillance. In fact, art forgery must have been a lot easier too, before the computer advances of today. I’m impressed anyone still manages to pull off forgeries. By comparison to our CSI-obsessed world, it seems practically easy to be a criminal in the swingin’ sixties.

The era is a huge part of this film. Nicole’s wardrobe is practically a fashion show of mod couture and the constant drinking, kissing, and getting engaged add a wild sixties energy to the whole proceedings. There’s also a lot of forced kisses played for laughs that started to make me uncomfortable and reminded me that for all of the style the sixties got right, there were a lot of politics the era got wrong.

We’ve covered the heist, now how about the romance? O’Toole and Hepburn are fabulous together which is a good thing considering that they spend so much time locked in a tiny closet. Her grace and his charm help shape a feisty yet sweet romance between the two. In a nice twist (the film has several), it turns out Simon knew the statue was a worthless fake and agreed to steal it simply because he liked Nicole. In any other movie I could quibble with the quickness of his affections, but, c’mon, it’s Audrey Hepburn. Anyone call fall in love with her in five minutes.

For those not accustomed to the pacing of old movies, How to Steal a Million might feel a bit slow. I think the pacing works beautifully, however, pulling us into the tension of that tiny little closet and building suspense as each phase of the plan is set in motion. So much of the comedy in this film (and I would call it laugh-out-loud-funny) comes not from the lines, but from the reaction shots. It’s a film full of people with large eyes who know how to widen them just enough to get a laugh. The film occasionally slows down to allow us to revel in a great reaction, and I’m only too happy to follow along.

How to Steal a Million is a near perfect movie with wit, charm, and some good ole fashion robbery to boot. It’s a film that celebrates forgery, yet feels fresh upon every viewing. It’s also a film in which romance, though ultimately crucial to the plot, feels secondary to just how much fun everyone onscreen is having.

Reality factor: Art forgeries, high stakes robberies, and hidden identities. It might not be realistic, but it’s real good. [1 out of 5]

Eye-candy factor: Peter O’Toole is the epitome of the suave sixties swinger. He’s an authentic Don Draper with a little less moral ambiguity and the world's bluest eyes. 
[4 out of 5]

Aww factor: Only Audrey Hepburn and Peter O’Toole can make breaking-and-entering utterly romantic. I’d give it a higher score if it weren’t for all of those uncomfortably aggressive kisses. [3 out of 5]

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