Released: 2011
Director: Sheree Folkson
Starring: Kelly Macdonald & David Tennant
Grade: B+
Unless you’ve
been exclusively watching rom coms and Doctor Who episodes, you’ve probably never heard of
this movie. If you’re nerdy passions happen to align with mine, then chances are high
that Netflix Instant has constantly been flinging this movie in your face too.
You see, this is a rom com starring the Doctor himself, David Tennant, and it’s
cheap looking poster has been staring out at me for weeks on the “Netflix
Recommends” page. The Decoy Bride is
about as formulaic as they come. It’s the kind of convoluted yet predictable
plot you might find in an ABC Family made-for-TV movie you spend the afternoon
half-watching as you clean your living room. Its UK roots, however, give it a
certain kind of charm and a couple of really lovely performances kept me way
more engaged than I expected. I fired up my Netflix, fully expecting this film
to be terrible. That might be part of the reason I enjoyed it as much as I did.
To fill you in, The
Decoy Bride is a small
film produced by a British production company called Ecosse Films and made on a
shoestring budget. If you want to get a taste of what you’ve been missing, you can check out the trailer here. The plot is fairly silly, even for a
rom com. Since I’m again assuming you’ve never heard of this one, I’ll fill you
in on some of the highlights. Famous actress and it-girl Lara Tyler (Alice Eve)
is determined to keep her wedding to author James Arber (David Tennant)
paparazzi-free. Deterred by freakishly dedicated photographers in the past,
Lara decides to move the wedding to the tiny Scottish island of Hegg ,where
James theoretically spent time doing research for his one and only successful
novel. Turns out, however, he’s never actually been to Hegg (“You googled the
entire book!”) which leads to one or two lost-on-the-island jokes and not much
else.
Hegg, as we
learn, has a population of 75 people and the most exciting thing to happen
recently is the drowning of one of Donald’s sheep. Yet this is where Katie Nic
Aodh (Kelly Macdonald) calls home. Katie is a writer whose biggest gig so
far was writing the description of pants for a catalogue. She’s got a rough history with men and after
her most recent break-up, she moves back in with her mom, reclaims her job
at the local convenience store, and declares herself "man vegan." She also reclaims the title of
only-single-girl-under-50 on the island.
Katie is the
film’s heart, a down-on-her-luck girl who manages to be both self-deprecating
and optimistic. Kelly MacDonald is truly a delight and I was shocked to find
out this was her first and only rom com. She’s got great comedic timing and her
quirkiness never feels put on. Two-thirds of the way through the movie, Katie’s
mom asks if she likes James. Katie replies, “He's an emotionally retarded
arty-boy who’s in love with another woman. Of course I like him.” I don’t know
if I’ve ever related more to a rom com heroine.
There are a
whole lot of plotlines in The Decoy Bride, most of which are entirely unnecessary.
There’s a paparazzo obsessed with snapping Lara’s wedding photo who later falls
in love with her (it’s just as creepy as it sounds). Lara has a stressed out
team including her agent Steve (a toned-down Michael Urie of Ugly Betty fame) who must cater to her whims. Katie
has a sick, wheelchair-bound mother and there’s a smattering of other Hegg
residents who could have been used much more effectively if we’d gotten a
little more time to know them.
The biggest
problem, other than the predictability of the film, is that there’s no
chemistry whatsoever between James and his bride-to-be Lara. Their whole
relationship is just confusing. Apparently Lara is the hottest actress in
Hollywood and James is in love with her largely because he feels he’s supposed
to be in love with her.
It’s hard to imagine Alice Eve either as a sex symbol or a brilliant actress,
however, so the whole thing just feels hollow.
After Lara is
spooked by a photog on Hegg, she goes on the lam and Steve decides to stage a
fake wedding to throw off the press. Enter the titular decoy bride, our very
own Katie (she’s the only young, single girl, remember?) Katie accidentally signs her own name
on the wedding register and she and James end up married. What a kooky dilemma!
Katie and James must track down Lara, avoid the paparazzi, get a divorce, and
of course, fall in love in the process.
The film is
pretty much a checklist of clichés. Meet cute (in an abandoned bathroom), up
the stakes (accidental marriage), rescue scene (Katie almost drowns), sexual
tension (we’ve got to change our clothes separated only by a thin curtain as
slow music plays). The major plot points are by-the-numbers, but thankfully
some of the details are unique, courtesy of both the script and the actors.
Plus I can’t complain too much about any film that finds an excuse to dress
David Tennant like a long lost member of the Bee Gees.
Thankfully the
farcical, over-the-top physical comedy that plagues so many modern rom coms is
kept at a minimum and the film has a quiet British sensibility about it that I
really enjoyed. Tennant is an unusual choice for a male romantic lead given
that his real strengths lay decidedly in comedy and drama, and most leading men
aren’t really allowed to reach either extreme. (Except in Shakespeare). Tennant does the best he can
with the material he’s given, bringing a great sense of understated humor to a
role that’s largely ill-defined for most of the movie.
You might be
asking yourself what’s redeemable about this film and I have one word for you:
Tenn-Donald. Mac-Nant. Alright, maybe their names don’t combine well, but
Tennant and MacDonald are just so good together they deserve their own stupid
nickname. Their onscreen chemistry is palpable and even though they’re just
going through the bickering-turns-to-loving paces, it’s a joy to watch them do
it. They are both so unassuming and awkward that their clichéd romance feels
somehow fresh. I really can’t say enough about how good these two are and how
good they are together. I suppose you can just toss it up to some weird
Scottish connection (Tennant is Scottish as well, although he uses a British
accent here.) Seriously, if this film were just the two of them trapped in a
room together I would probably have it on my top ten favorite movies list.
I also have to
give this film major points for having a rom com ending which reaches some
great emotional high points without feeling too over-the-top. It’s a quiet,
sweet ending to a film that is only sometimes quiet and sweet. It made my
genuinely smile which is a rare feat for a cynical rom com reviewer like me.
The real
question remains: is this movie worth watching? For me, the answer is a
resounding yes- so long as you know what to expect going in. The Decoy Bride
has shades of Knotting
Hill (actor falls in
love with an average joe) and the 2010 Amy Adam’s vehicle Leap Year (foreigner explores a tiny UK island
looking for love.) While The Decoy Bride is nowhere near as good as Knotting Hill, it’s far superior to Leap Year, thanks largely to its fantastic central
pairing. I wouldn’t make a special trip to the video store to rent it, but if
you’ve got Netflix Instant and an hour and a half to waste, you could do a lot
worse than watching two Scottish actors charm the pants off one another.
Reality
factor: Kelly
MacDonald’s lovely grounded performance and her chemistry with Tennant are the
only believable aspects in this overblown Hollywood fairy tale. [1 out of 5]
Eye-candy
factor: Only David Tennant
can make high-waisted bell bottoms and fur vests look good. [4 out of 5]
Aww factor:
I would watch a whole
movie that was nothing but David Tennant kissing people on the forehead. [5
out of 5]
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